mabuhay! kasalukuyan mong binabaybay ang aking makulay at masayang page!

March 22, it was official.
Not a Cum Laude, not even a graduate with Distinction. I received my diplomas (yes 2 diplomas for me), from St. Scho for degrees in Mass Communication and Marketing Management.

I have long endured the remorse of not giving extra effort to have distinction.. it was rubbed by Dean Ching again when I got my certificates saying:
"Diane what happened, konti nalang! With Distinction ka na?!!"

Gusto ko lang sabihin, "I know right..."


Anyhow, walang super happiness nung graduation because of three things.
1. I have 5 tickets but no one in mind to invite
2. My mom did not made it to my graduation
3. I will be part of the thousands of graduates who are unemployed.

5+1 thanks to Chiquee
At the last minute, I invited Daddy Del and Mommy Ely (my foster parents ) to attend my graduation. I reserved 3 tickets for Ehzel, Rain and Nika kasi, then 1 for Jed. Buti nalang Chiquee gave me one more extra ticket so I was able to invite Daddy Del. I was thankful they were there to witness the event, kahit na Mommy Ely whispered to me while I was marching...

"Ang tagal pala nito?!!!"

I was the last one to March kasi and the guest all stood to wait for me as I strutted along the field of St. Scho. Dahil dun, kainis, ang bilis ko daw maglakad, wala tuloy akong matinong pictures habang naglalakad ako...

Pawis na pwis kami, nakakatawa nga, nung solian na ng toga, nagkakahiyaan ung ibang maghubad ng toga... mga nakadress tas basang basa yung mga kili-kili!! ahahaha buti nalang nakablack top ako!

when i reached the pergola, maiyak-iyak si papa (buti naman!) and he handed me a bouquet of flowers! (awwww.. may hidden sweetness pala ang tatay ko?!!)


Kwentuhan kami sa MiniStop.. hindi kami makapaniwala na grad ko na.. fresh na fresh pa sa memories namin ang graduation nila last year...

Rain has worked for 8 months at Samsung, si Nika sa Etelecare and si Ehzel, sa BPI Marikina. Ako, san kaya?!

tamang picture-picture lang while waiting for our sundo and then off to the thanksgiving dinner!

Thank you Sisdang, but I still prefer Aling Tonyang's
Sisdang restaurant was more cozy than other restaurants in Seaside.. however, nothing beats the taste of Aling Tonyang's!

Hindi ko mashadong gusto ang lasa, masarap oo, pero mas masarap di hamak sa Aling Tonyang's!

Ang daming order ni Ate Madel, inabot kami ng more than P13000 for the dinner! thanks to my dad for the treat!

Grad Gifts
As usual, wala pang grad gift si Papa.. wala pang Xmas Gift, wala pang New Year's Gift, wala pang Graduation gift.. haha

Si Mama ko, wala din.

Rain gave me a Mango Cake from Goldilocks, Nek did not give me her gift, basura daw... ewan ko dun! Si ehzel kamusta naman ung gift saken.. Lingerie. I love Hannadale's gift for me.. Bra and Panty from Bench!

so i guess i am now an official unemployed filipina.
or maybe not.... let's see...

tomorrow, I will start working in an Ad Agency. Trial palang. Pero I'll be paid na. I guess they are in dire need of extra creative minds for a certain project. I dont care. basta I will spend my time productively + I get paid.

Bow.

sabi nga nila kapag wala ka nang masyadong ginagawa, that's when you contemplate on your past...

you look back one.. two... three.. four.. (and for us, five) years ago and see what have you done so far.. you recall.... and the events just flash in front of your eyes in sepia tone.. eto yung feeling na parang kahapon lang nangyari ang mga bagay2...

madaming mga pangyayari sa buhay ko nitong college... eto yung tipong pwede kong ikwento sa mga apo ko.. at sila naman, ikkwento sa mga classmates nila na may panimulang linya na,

"wala kayo sa lola Diane ko!"

Kaso nga lang, magandang ikwento, pero pag idinetalye ko sa knila ang mga nagawa ko.. natatakot akong mapahiya at sabhin lang nila na...

"Nyeee... mahina ka pala lola Diane eh.. yan lang nagawa mo nun? Panis!"

Ano nga bang mga nagawa ko? Meron nga ba?

Ngayon, mag-isa ako sa The Scholastican Office.. walang aircon at nagiintay ng 2 oras para sa final graduation practice namin.

Gamit ko ang bulok na computer namin na skeleton na ang CPU at sobrang infested ng virus..

Tinitignan ko ang kwadradong kwarto na 'to.. ang gulo.. yung mga gamit ko last last year, andun parin sa pinakataas na pigeon hole, ang dating lugar na inukupahan ng mga nagdaang patnugot ng The Scholastican na si Ping at Margie...

Hanga ako sa dalawang yon, pareho silang nagpursue ng journalism careers.. si Margie nasa InFlight Magazine at si Ping naman nasa Manila Times...

Ako, san kaya ako patungo?


Ang Tanga KO
Madaming bagay tungkol sa TS ang nagpalungkot sakin. Nagsisisi ako dahil hindi ko ito binigyan ng pagmamahal na nararapat para dito, Ang katwiran ko, maging noong unang araw na pagtalaga sa akin bilang Editor in Chief, Ehhh.. hindi ko naman gusto tong posisyon na ito eh!!!

Oo alam ko, ngayon na ilang araw nalang ang nalalabi sakin bilang EIC ng TS at bilang LiaCom student ng St. Scho, naiisip ko, na dapat ginawa ko na lahat ng makakaya ko para mapaganda ang TS.

Hindi ko maayos na namotivate ang aking mga editors, wala akong natrain para humalili sa kanilang mga posisyon, hindi maganda ang naging recruitment namin at nagkaroon kami ng hindi pagkakaunawaan ng aking kaibigan at Associate Editor na si Bene.

Ngayon, may isang deliverable nalang ako for TS at buti nalang at madali ko naman nakakausap si Dean Azurin, kaya hindi naipit ang clearance namin tulad ng nangyari last year.. Magazine nalang..

Sa pagprepare namin ni Cynthia, Features Editor, for the mag, narealize ko na siya pala yung taong gusto ng mga presswork, mga sleepovers para motivated kumilos.. nakakainis, if only i knew.. i could have scheduled for regular sleep overs sa bahay.. para naging maganda yung results ng past year...

Nitong March narin nang magrecruitment kami for the next batch at grabeh ang acceptance ng mga Scholasticans.

natutuwa ako, at least natulungan ko na ang next editorial batch sa pamamagitan ng pagrerecruit. Bakit nga ba hindi ko ito ginawa nung second sem, nung hirap na hirap kami sa pagsusulat dahil wala ngang members.

Magbasa ng Mga Lumang Emails,magugulat ka sa iyong makikita
Isa pa sa mga pagsisisi ko.. akin nalang.. nakakahiya kasi..pero ang lesson, matutong magbasa ng spam, mga inbox, sent items ng email mo. Hindi mo alam kung may mga importanteng mails na natabunan at nalimot na ng panahon.

Ganito yung realization ko after akong may nakita sa mga last year mails ko. Nakipag-away pa ako sa isang tao only to find out that she sent her deliverable after all...Nakakahiya...

Isa pang narealize ko sa pagbabasa ng old mails sa inbox ko...nakita ko yung pinang-gagalingan ng isang tao..

may isang taong sobrang daming email sa akin dati.. isa siyang tao na nasa posisyon pero ng sumunod na taon, naging under sha sakin.

hindi ko magets yung point niya bakit niya ako pinersonal, eh kaya nga kami nagsasama para magwork....

pero after reading her old mails, yung mga plans nila, mga nagawa niya, i then realized na she was more experienced than i was. I might have been to blind to see that especially when i realized i hold a higher position than her. But all she wanted was to get thjings done.. i may have belittled her for not having several knowledge that i have.. but in the end, she knows how to run this "thing" better than i did...

Pero tapos na eh. Hindi na namin naayos, very civil nalang ngayon at kung minsan, non-existent kami sa buhay ng bawat isa.

Journalism Award
Isa pa ito eh, ginawa kong motivation ang pagkakaroon ng award para maging EIC...sabi ko mag-aaply ako for this award...

So balik ako ng balik sa Student Affairs Office (SAO) para tanungin kung open na for application.. eh nagthesis kami, tas nag-event kami.. tas clearance period... at nang magtanong ako muli sa SAO............

Tita Claire (Secretary): "Ha?! Tapos na ang deliveration period, tapos na ang application for non-academic awards."

Gumuho mundo ko. Sayang!!! Ito na nga lang ang pwede kong ikabit sa pagkahaba-haba kong course bago ako umakyat sa stage.. nawala pa???!!

Nakakalungkot.

Pero maybe its God's way of saying that you havent done enough for The Scholastican,.are you sure you are deserving to bag the award...

Ang sagot ko kay God,

"Ehhh God naman, sana at least, pinag-apply niyo ako diba? Para hindi ganito kalaki yung pagsisisi ko, na malalaman ko na na tapos na yung application period!!!"

Pero actually, marami din nainis, dahil hindi well disseminated ang information na open na for application. Badtrip kasi in the end apat lang ang nag-apply kaya apat lang din ang awardee. VERY UNFAIR.

Sa bagay, who ever said that life is Fair?

Moving Forward
Wala namang ibang movement kung hindi forward.. kaya mula ng narealize ko na ang mga ito.. sabi ko gagawin ko nalang lahat pa ng makakaya ko.

1. Magrecruit ng New Members - DONE
2. Magbigay ng mga freebies sa New Members - DONE (Thank you very much Miles AM of Nike Philippines for the Nike My Game DVDs and Sir Ollie Marcelo of Ample Printing Press for the free notepads)
3. Mag-interview at magpa-exam sa new Editorial Board
4. Mag Team Building and Journalism Seminar for the new EB and members
5. Gumawa ng report for the SAO and to the EB for recommendations for the next batch of EB.

i hope this time magawa ko lahat.

Definitely magiging lesson sakin ito.. sad to say ngayon ko lang narealize ang mga bagay-bagay.. kung kelan tapos na term ko bilang EIC...

As March 22 (the final judgement or should I say the date of graduation) is nearing, I find myself carefully massaging my batok daily.... i dunno if my blood pressure is escalating but one thing for sure... I HAVE LOTS OF STUFFS TO WORRY ABOUT IN THE COMING WEEKS.

HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE NO.1: The Scholastican
I am not yet cleared by the Student Affairs Office cos I still have to release two more issue for The Scholastican, one literary folio and one magazine. What makes my pressure rise is my literary editor who is always missing in action and who has not performed her responsibilities as editor and yet you'll find her name to be a mainstay in your multiply inbox. Yes, this girl updates her multiply regularly and even has the time to go to gimik to Dolce! Hindi ba naman tataas ang blood pressure mo non?! They are way beyond the deadline that i gave them and still is not yet progressing (altho I'd like to thank my Male Literary Editor for doing his job in making this work, thanks)

I met up with my Features Editor and Managing Editor yesterday at Starbucks to discuss our plan for the magazine. The planning and brainstorming went great, set aside the occasional sarcastic remarks of my Managing Ed.. but in the end every detail were useful

HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE NO.2: Mama Mia's Coming Home!
After 18 long years, at last, Mama's coming home. You might be thinking of the typical balikbayan scenario :

Me, waiting in the arrival of NAIA...
Mama, fixer her baggages quickly upon landing of the plane..

Cut to cut scene of me being agitated to see her, and then her, clumsily briging her bags to meet us..

Then the scene's climax is when we run towards each other, crying and hugging each other like there's no tomorrow.

Uhmm, I don't think ganito mangyayari. Diba nga masakit ang batok ko.
I am concerned in so many things, other than seeing her..

Yeah, I once blogged about my dreams of going to grocery with my mom, or going shopping at 168 together.. pero nung malaman kong, BAKA FOR GOOD NA SIYA DITO SA PILIPINAS... Napaisip ako..

Is this the best time to go home? Eh wala pa nga akong trabaho.... Meaning, parang I still need help from them (her and papa) hanggang hindi pa stable yung career ko (what career?). Parang naweweirduhan ako sa mga pangyayari. Kasi I want her to be here to witness my graduation, I dont want her here for good! I want to go to the US! I want to have a vacation there, gusto ko din mapetition! I want to work there (pero not now, recession eh)

It all started when I asked her to buy a house in the US, sabi ko kasi, its very cheap to buy now, hanggang recession pa. She said, "Why would I need to buy a house here, Im coming home to the Philippines?"

So I was like?! What?! youre staying here for good?! What If Jed goes to New York (with his tita) and he petitions me, pano siya (mama) dito sa Pinas?

Sobrang inappropriate kasi ng actions niya eh. What I needed to hear from my mom is enough na yung ipon niya to buy her own house, to start her own business and to at least supply for her needs while I am not yet earning.... Pero until now, she remained secretive of her plans... Kaya ewan ko ba!

Hiwalay na sila ng Dad ko. Does she expect na bubuhayin siya ni Papa? Of course not. Pero I dont think Mama will make hingi din naman kay Dady eh...

Sabi na nga lang ni Mama Steve (Mama for us cavitenos means Uncle).. Wag nga daw ako magworry. First, hindi siya uuwi dito sa Pinas kung hindi ayos papeles niya. Meaning Citizen na siya and she can go back there anytime she likes. 2nd uuwi siya sa Pilipinas dahil marami na siya ipon.

Nappressure kasi ako na I have to work immediately na kasi nga mababawasan na allowance ko, from Mama...ewan! Gulo!

HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE NO.3 How to Spend My Vacation
I wanna spend this vacation with a blast! Pero sa dami ng pressure.. ewan ko ba! Actually pati kung san magbabakasyon eh, kinasasakit ng batok ko! Gusto ng NERDS na mag Cebu, game naman ako dun! Gusto ng LiaCom Peeps na mag Quezon Province kina Hannadale then Boracay.. DJ wants to go to Bora din and Ate Kai promised me of Bora din..

I want to go to Hong Kong, Macau and China on April na agad, pero my other relatives, punta ata by May pa.. sasabay kaya kami dun? Eh pending din nga dahil sa pag-uwi ni Mama..

Tanginaaaaaa talk about pigtal the ugat sa batok?!!

1. Open your library (iTunes, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool...

Opening Credits: So Sick (Ex-Girlfriend) - NEYO

Waking Up: A Promise (Rough) - Chicosci (steeeg... gising na gising ako dito!)

First Day of School: Kapag Tumibok ang Puso - Toni Gonzaga (shet, kahiya, huli ako may ganito akong song... )

Falling in Love: Apologize by One Republic and Timbaland

Fight Song: Shawty Get Loose - Lil Mama, TPain and Chris Brown

Prom: Nakapagtataka - Spongecola (hell yeah! Hindi ka ba napapagod, o di kaya'y nagsasawa?!!)

Life: Tanginaaaaa!!!! Don't Cry Out Loud - Rachel Ann Go (bwiset?! Baket eto pa?!)

Mental Breakdown: Bo Jangles - Pitbull

Driving: Hey Sexy Mama - Shaggy

Flashback: Cat and Mouse - Red Jumpsuit Apparatus (ayyy nako, alam ko na baket eto pang flash back.... hmmp!)

Getting back Together: I Write Sins Not Tragedies - Panic at the Disco (?????????)

Losing Your Virginity: Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield and Esmee Denters (hahaha, release your inhibition! feel the rain on your skin!!!)

Wedding: Taste my Ice Cream - J.S.

Birth of Child: Touch my Body - Mariah Carey (bwahahaha, juzko, anak ko, wag kang maging malandi tulad ni Mariah?!)

Final Battle: Glamorous - Gossip Girl OST (hmmm, siguro makikipagsabunutan ako sa isang kikay rich kid!)

Death Scene: With Me - Sum 41 (awts )

Funeral Song: Forever - Chris Brown (okay na sa death scene eh.. tas biglang libing Chris Brown?!)

Final Credits: Bwiset! Of all the songs, baket eto pa!! Your Guardian Angel - RJA